I spent the last four years of my life growing more than I could ever think possible.
I won’t make a list, because that would make me feel braggy and complain-y all at the same time. Instead, I’ll tell you a quick story.
Seven days ago, I walked away (more like ran, full-speed) from a job that I had grown into for four years. I left to pursue something that was not established and has no guarantee of being a success. On the last day of my “traditional” job, I remember being mad. I was mad that I had spent the last year being mad.
There was a post circulating through social media a couple of weeks ago that I felt very connected to. It was about outside and inside views of high functioning anxiety. In that very moment, the world clicked into place. I was letting fear of failure, being wrong, saying “no” and slowing down control my life. I was giving other people too much control over my life and emotions and I had lost myself. I was mad
But I made a decision to not feel that way anymore. Tuesday, January 7th at 10:40 a.m. I sent Jared a text message with a few choice words drawn from my emotions and let him know I was putting in my two-week notice on Friday morning. It was something we had spent the prior few months talking about, so he was nothing but supportive of my decision. In fact, he joked that I should have just walked out.
Now I am here… sitting in my red office chair, looking out my window watching squirrels play in the trees and listening to Quinn (my co-worker/dog) snore on the couch. I am so, so happy.
If I could go back and tell my younger self one thing, it would be to never settle. Never stop chasing your dreams. Never stop seeking happiness. In the last year, I saw a friend lose their life to unhappiness. It crushed me, but it lit such a fire under my ass. No one should ever feel that way.
My charge for you is this:
Dream about your life and what you want. Write it down. Write it down again in detail. Write it down and mean it.
Now go get it. You can, should and will achieve your dreams.
I am still discovering all of mine, but it’s happening before my very eyes.
I am not special. I am not on a journey that only I can achieve. You deserve all the same things I am chasing. And I want to be your biggest cheerleader.